We all have someone whom we admire in our life, who is our idol, whose life inspires us, who leaves a sharp impression in our mind with his/her charismatic personality. I too have many such stars in my admiration list. I don’t treat them as idols as I believe you should never strive to be a mirror image of someone. Such people are unique and it is impossible to emulate them. They have each left a distinct mark in humanity and we too should do exactly the same in our conquest for greatness, leave our own distinct mark. But there are many whose qualities I wish could imbibe, whose allure I could match, whose struggles I could take an example from. My one year stay in Hyderabad made way for one more name to be included in that list – Raghu uncle.
Raghu uncle is a distant cousin of my mother who is settled in Hyderabad since more than 30 years. Unfortunately we had never been in touch before because of the distant family roots. I hadn’t even heard of his name till I was posted in Hyderabad. I was reluctant to call him after reaching there but finally did so, much to Amma’s insistence. But when I spoke to him over the phone for the first time, he talked as if we have known each other for years. His voice had a tone of humility in it.
That week he came to the office campus where we had been put up, in a hired SUV with a driver and took us to his house in a place calledKarkhana, located well within the city limits. At first I thought it would be his own vehicle since had heard from Amma that he is a marketing director in some firm. But as days passed I realized that he owned only a Honda Activa and had no penchant for cars or any luxuries to that regard. His better half, Geeta aunty was no less than an angel. She fed us, enquired about my family back in Mumbai. The display of hospitality was something I had never seen or exhibited before.
Raghu uncle tried finding us an accommodation in places where he had contacts but unfortunately Hyderabad is averse to renting apartments to bachelors for obvious orthodox reasons. He even offered me to stay with him since only he and Geeta aunty were staying there; both their kids are in the U.S. But I thanked and refused as it would be like deserting my batch mates. We found another apartment by ourselves later through an agent. Raghu uncle on hearing this apologized to me for not being able to help. I wasn’t expecting that from him since he is an elder. Yet he had the humility to say sorry. He did that on couple of other occasions.
He is a deeply spiritual man but at the same time does very well know that we should try hard and seek answers ourselves before knocking the doors of the Almighty. One gets wonderstruck seeing his active nature at this age. He must be 60 something but moves around like a person half his age, full of vivacity and ardor. He is involved actively in number of social activities in nearby temples. I was fortunate to be a part of few of them. It was really kind of him to take me to those activities. The Ayappa temple near his house feeds the poor every alternate Sundays and provides free medical treatment too. He involves himself actively in all these.
I had to once take an early morning flight to Kochi to attend my sister’s wedding. A special bus shuttles between the airport and different bus bays in Hyd. Raghu uncle drove his Activa early morning to my place to drop me till the bus bay. To say, it was a small thing but imagine doing that early in the morning for a distant relative, when I could have easily taken a rickshaw. That was really a kind gesture from him.
He and Geeta aunty treated me really well whenever I visited them. I hardly remember to have come on my own to visit their house. Uncle used to pick me up from my place on the day I wished to meet, which was usually Sundays. We then used to visit 2-3 temples, where he offered flowers and prayed. His prayers were very brief, not praying for more than five seconds before a deity! He was very swift in his movements and very particular about doing ‘pratakshinas’ around the temple. We rode home after that where Geeta aunty served awesome homely breakfast. Sundays at Raghu uncle’s home were indeed a big relief from the bland hotel food. We used to head to other temples after that, wherever there was any activity. Raghu uncle had huge social circle around him. Almost everybody in Karkhana knows him and he is always greeted with a smile; he reciprocates with a bigger one, enquires about their health and families and jokes at times.
The donation he makes is just commendable. It is never monetary, mostly groceries and edibles. I still remember him carrying sack of rice to temples on the scooter with me. Upon reaching the temple he unloaded the sack in the temple kitchen and instructed the people there to utilize it judiciously. He cares for the beasts too; feeds the cows with cooked rice and bananas on the way! All this was a totally new and moving experience for me. I had never donated anything substantial in my life, though I always wished to, but never knew of a proper channel to make it materialize. But now he seemed to be giving me a direction on this.
In his company I have experienced the cultures and traditions of Kerala, many of them just heard about or seen in the T.V before. It was a holistic feeling; taking part in pushp’abhishekam during Shabarimala season, hearing all sing Harivaranasam, doing service in temples on Sundays.
He is not a kind of person who would say yes to anything and everything. He actively voices his opinion and doesn’t care if it is conflicting with other’s views. He scolds people whenever he felt they did wrong, praises them for their good work. He is in fact one of the few men on my elite list of people whom we need as leaders and bureaucrats in today’s India. He is bold, confident and courageous in his talks, and most importantly walks his talk.
The day I visited his house for the last time (I was posted in Mumbai after the assignment in Hyd.), I touched his feet. He blessed me whole heartedly, hugged me and gave me his wishes. It felt like coming from a genuine person and I will always cherish the warmth of that moment.
I call him on festivals to wish and at other times too. He still has the humility and charisma in his voice. He enquires about my job, family, everything. He still apologizes repeatedly whenever I call and he’s unable to answer. I and Amma plan to visit Hyd. soon particularly to meet him and Geeta aunty. We have got lots to thank them for.
Raghu uncle has taught me to have an existence that is not centered on making money or thinking of just your well being, but to take the world with you by helping the unfortunate ones. I will always be indebted to him for helping me out in situations, for treating me as a part of their family without paying heed that we were never in touch before, bringing me closer to human qualities, social well being, the culture and traditions of Kerala and of course relieving me of vapid hotel food on Sundays J
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